the-liebster-award

I have noticed that my past blog posts have been rather morose so I thought I would take the opportunity of accepting the Liebster Award for the second time. What? These things are fun. I couldn’t pass the chance.

I was nominated by Jamila, a talented blogger with such cheerful posts and such beautiful words that warm one’s heart. Really, you should read her blog. She writes about really enthralling topics, such as Gothic novels from the 1700s and loves the band Behemoth, which I loved seeing live. My gratitude for the nomination is grand. Thank you!

I think the first time I was nominated I forgot to list my random facts so I shall do that now.

Just so you all know, The Liebster Award is for bloggers to get more recognition for their amazing blogs (because they deserve it) and who also happen to have less than 200 followers. It’s very fun to do it as I have done it before 😀

Rules for accepting this award: (I still quite don’t know them well but I am to try)

  • Write eleven random facts about yourself
  • Thank the blogger and most heartily link their blog on your own
  • Nominate eleven bloggers with less than 200 followers
  • Make a post celebrating your award
  • Answer the eleven questions asked and ask eleven ones to your nominated bloggers

 Here are my eleven random facts about myself:

  1. I had my first kiss when I was around four and I ended up slapping the boy who I did that with. He watched too many soap operas.
  2. I’ve been studying Finnish since I was twelve.
  3. When I go to the bathroom and use the sink, I tend to look at myself in the mirror, talk, sing, make faces and try to act like a silent movie star.
  4. I know I truly like something if I still like it after a year.
  5. I once listened to my favorite band’s third album every day on an April.
  6. I pretend to be my other idols and I have even created personalities for them.
  7. A llama once spat on my face.
  8. My happiest childhood memories come from Chiclayo, a northern city in Peru where I lived for six years.
  9. I was obsessed with the Emmanuelle movies when I was eight. I saw them with an artistic perspective.
  10. I act like Greta Garbo’s movie characters most of the time.
  11. I once brought a tiny EMPTY Finlandia vodka bottle to class for a speech and ended up horribly demeaned by my teacher. I cried all the way home.

 The questions I was asked:

 1. What music do you like?

I love this question 🙂 Let’s see, for months now I’ve been listening to my Type O Negative albums over and over again. They evoke such passion from me, make me feel that I could be more comfortable with my emotions and they could make something so melancholy sound so rough but at the same time so sweet. They take me to such a climax…To me, they say, “It’ll be all right. We understand you.” Peter Steele in his lyrics sings of serious issues a human being has to deal with. Such as heartbreak, irritation, misery and hopelessness. All in all, he may have sounded immensely frustrated when he sang at times, but he was actually letting others get in touch with his sensible, tender being that he was 🙂 And one knows that when listening to a lot of his music.

Another big band for me is The Doors. When I say big band, I mean that I own more than five of their albums, and that is what they are for me. When I was fourteen, and all I listened to was black metal, I discovered The Doors. Morrison spoke to me so truthfully through his lyrics. I loved the organ. Just everything. They sounded so different from any group. I obsessively listened to Strange Days on the summer of that year. I can recite the lyrics of the songs of that album with my eyes closed. It’s very psychedelic but very original which makes one feel that way about himself.

I love my Frank Zappa. I love love my Zappa. I discovered him when I was bored because my favorite singer talked about him. I decided to buy his first album with the Mothers of Invention and….I was hooked. Just saying, Zappa’s music is not meant to be liked by everybody, and that’s ok. His music was very different in his day, and still is, in my opinion. Well, I like it. I don’t even own all of his hundred albums and I am not even halfway there 😦 GREAT MUSICIAN AND GUITARIST!!! Oh god, just watch him play “Black Napkins”. He once in an interview said he hated recording his guitar solos because he felt it was boring but loved improvising them whenever he played them live. Oh god, I wish I could see him live…He was a very intelligent person as well and had very strong opinions about certain things, such as politics. Some of his music is not meant to be taken seriously because it was mostly satire and ridiculed a lot of things. That’s okay 😀 I love reciting the lyrics. Especially to We’re Only in It for the Money, which I should say is my one the greatest albums I have ever heard.

I also do love early Black Sabbath. You know, seventies Sabbath with Ozzy. They also know what I feel but I love them specifically for their MUSIC. Oh sweet lord, especially my Tony Iommi. I remember when I was thirteen and was obsessed with Slayer, I decided to check out Sabbath’s first album from the library. Oh, god, what a great decision I made. I repeated three times on the same day and even fell asleep. The song “Warning” is so beautifully relaxing….A month later I found myself listening to their albums everyday…Albums such as Master of Reality and Sabotage….Hmm, those were the days. I will never forget Sabbath….My Bill Ward just majestically playing those drums, my adorable Geezer Butler with his sweater and puffy hair going crazy with that bass, my precious Tony Iommi playing with his left hand (with some missing fingertips) wearing that big cross and my Ozzy shrieking like a hyena. What a band. What history they made in my life.

Other stuff I like listening would fall in my random category. I at times listen to old love songs in Spanish, like the ones sung by Miguel Bose or Silvana Di Lorenzo. Judy Garland also with a voice I could never get tired of hearing. Pola Negri’s melodic songs in German. I still like some metal, but I don’t listen to it as much as I used to. I mean, I now barely do. I still like some eighties Kreator, Reverend Bizarre and Candlemass. I’m very picky with bands actually. It took me some time to even start liking Type O Negative. Some of their songs I thought were fantastic…but the ones that were very moody weren’t for me. Then I bought Life is Killing Me and everything changed. You can see more of my music taste in my music page.

2. Do you believe in ghosts, extra terrestrials, Nessie, fae, trolls, vampires, shape-shifters or anything that people commonly regard as being “Supernatural”?

I believe in ghosts, I think that’s really the only thing I believe in in this whole list. I feel ghosts are watching me all the time, especially the ones of my idols. When someone I know dies, I am even scared to be alone in private because I know they will haunt me. When Michael Jackson died, I couldn’t sleep the whole night because I thought he was going to appear right outside my window. It’s so damnably terrifying, which also explains why I am also afraid of the dark.

3. What are the things you are interested in and love doing or talking about?

I like watching silent films and old films overall, which I’ve made pretty clear here. I love talking and writing about Pola Negri, a Polish actress who was very popular during the silent era. I also enjoy writing my feelings down because it takes a load off my shoulders and mind. I like talking mostly about my interests, which are either about Finland, movies or my favorite bands.

4. What qualities do you most despise in others?

I guess of them could be dishonesty. I hate it when people lie. It hurts me too deeply. Then there’s vanity, which some people, especially famous people have. We are all humans and being treated like deities seems kind of idiotic. Also being cold-hearted is something that hurts me as well. It makes me feel that one doesn’t care or ever will.

5. What is something other people don’t like about you?

I’m very moody and I say hurtful things in my sad and mad states. I hurt a lot of feelings. I despise and judge things I sort of like and then regret it afterwards. I am lazy. Manipulative. Bossy. And I say no a lot. I’m also not very friendly in school, as I don’t talk to anyone because I am sure they are making fun of me. I guess I strike some people as a bit conceited because I am so quiet and involved in my own affairs and don’t give a care for anyone else. I try to not be selfish most of the time.

6. What is your earliest memory?

I remember I was maybe around one and I was sitting in my parents’ bedroom and I was watching the music video of Ricky Martin’s “She’s All I Ever Had” on TV and I kept saying he was my father. At that moment I believed he really was but no. He just kinda resembled my actual father.

7. How long have you been in this planet for?

🙂 years, darlings. 🙂 long, tempestuous years.

8. What are some things that make you different from other people?

My taste in film could be one, haha. The way I think, I guess. My music taste. Um, the fact that I’m not smoking weed or doing any of that sad promiscuous stuff. I don’t know how to quite list the things that make me differ from others. You would have to figure it out yourself 😀

9. When you die, what would you like to be remembered for?

For the fact that I existed. That I had thoughts and beliefs. That I suffered a great deal but was resilient and that everything was worth surviving for at the end. In the future I would maybe like to direct or star in some films so maybe…I mean, through films, I feel directors and actors convey a message to me with their artistry and I would like to do so for the ones in the upcoming generations. I will definitely also write my books and others could read my words and thoughts as one can do here. I will publish my memoirs when I’m in my sixties like Pola Negri did so everyone could know of my fascinating life. Ha, oh, ha.

10. What is something that you don’t like about yourself, or that you are embarrassed about?

I’m emotionally fragile and I break easily. Things easily affect me. Also my appearance. I can’t talk to people face-to-face without thinking that they are exploring me with judgment. I’m also obsessive with my interests and spend too much time on my own dwelling on them. I also at times tend to judge people before I really know them and I really hate it and try not to do it at all. I also have too many thoughts and overthink things and put myself in a very bad mood. I also tend to be very pessimistic when depressed. Oh yes, one important thing, I’m very shy and get red when I talk to anyone in person.

11. What assumptions are you tired of people making about you?

People usually tend to think I am from Mexican or Indian because I have dark hair and dark eyes. There have been people who have asked me from what part of Mexico I came. I mean, I just think it’s rude that you assume what country someone is from just because of how they look. You should ask them first. I haven’t even been to those countries or have relatives from there.

Some people in school thought that I was a bully because I at times wear leather jackets and dark clothing. Ok, that’s just silly. First of all, I’m not in the mood to buy new clothes so I am more comfortable wearing dark clothing because it fits my “sinister” style haha! Secondly, I’m pretty harmless and even avoid brushing past people so I don’t touch them. I don’t resort to violence until one attacks me first. And I don’t even talk to anyone so….people should just really get to know others before they start to have notions.

And I guess in my experiences, there have been some “professionals” I have seen to get help for my depression and all my psychological troubles, and they thought I was undergoing a phase or the “teenage blues”. Or some decided to misdiagnose me with a serious mental illness without knowing me for quite time yet. It takes time to find the right people.

Oh dear, these were some long responses. I appreciate people who still read my many paragraphs that never do seem to end.

My nominees: (these are incredibly brilliant blogs, darlings. Written by insanely cool people. Do give them a good old read!)

  1. MIB’s Instant Headache
  2. Beauty is Liberation
  3. True Tales of a Punk Rock Pinup
  4. Fannie Frankfurter
  5. Silents, Please!
  6. Hazelnut Pie
  7. Harlow’s Museum of Horror and Delights
  8. paulydeathwish
  9. It’s another fine product from the nonsense factory.
  10. Thoughts for the black hole
  11. The Vintage Vixen

My questions:

  1. What are your favorite films?
  2. What would you do if you had to go on tour with your favorite band?
  3. What is your idea of absolute bliss and happiness?
  4. What is something unthinkable, in your opinion?
  5. What is one music album that got you through the worst of all times?
  6. If you had all the money in the world, where would you live and what would you do?
  7. What film would you consider the most inspirational and artistically expressive?
  8. What is your opinion on silent films?
  9. What would you consider your one top obsession? 😀
  10. What is your opinion on those younger than you?
  11. What are some of your biggest regrets in life?

Well, I guess that’s it. I can’t wait to read many peculiar responses! And if you don’t feel like answering, it’s okay. Darlings, I do recommend all these blogs mentioned. They are so very well-written! I know my questions kind of suck so forgive me, dears, this post took quite some time 🙂 Actually, anyone is welcome to answer these questions. I guess I could break the rules a little bit, ha! Oh well! Have you all a fine day!

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